Ah yes, the Awkward Silence. What constitutes an awkward silence, you ask? Have you ever experienced a slight uneasiness during a silence within a conversation? If so, you my friend have experienced an awkward silence.
They are quite unfortunate, but they happen. After experiencing a bad case of the Awkward Silence today and not knowing how to tackle it, I decided to turn to the Internet. Yeah, I'm a total dweeb. But the Internet is resourceful, we must utilise it!
I typed in 'awkward silence' into the Google search bar and the first few results were a recording label, the MySpace of an actual music band, an Urban Dictionary entry and a wikiHow link. 'Wiki' sounded familiar so I decided to click on it. I ended up spending quite some time browsing the articles, they discuss the best topics. You know those topics you think about but you don't really ask people about it cos you feel you're supposed to know about it already? (i.e. How To Fill Awkward Silences)
I also found out a really interesting fact, anyone ever heard of The Awkward Turtle?
Apparently it can either break an awkward silence or make it even worse. Whatevs, I like those odds! I am so trying it out next time. (Not that I'm guaranteeing future awkward silences, of course.)
After reading a dozen articles, I realised the main points were to Listen, Be Yourself, Respect The Other Person and Don't Act Creepy (haha, the last one came up a lot in the 'How To Treat A Girl Well' articles)
So, you want to know how to treat a girl? Every girl is different, so not everything you do for one girl will necessarily flatter another. But, there are some general things you can do to show a girl that you care.
Steps:
1. Remember that every human being wants to be appreciated. The more genuine and specific you are, the better.
2. Respect her future. The fact is, you might not end up being "the one". Don't do anything that will compromise her future because of something you did. If you aren't ready to be a father, don't work the relationship that way. If you don't like "used goods" then don't ruin her possibilities by turning her into them.
3. Let her talk about herself. If you say you want to get to know her better, then take over all the conversations, she will think you are self-centered, and not very interested in her after all.
4. Find out about her hobbies by asking questions about the kind of music she likes, observing her environment, and asking about clothes or pictures she might have.
5. Compliment her. Say that her hair looks nice or that shirt looks great on her. Then look in her eyes, and smile. Mean it. Keep it real.
6. Tell her she is pretty. No matter how average she thinks her looks may be, a girl will usually be flattered and pleased to know you think she is attractive. Say "You've got the most beautiful eyes/hair/skin/hands/etc. I've ever seen" and again - mean it!
7. Take a shower, put on deodorant, brush your teeth, and shave if you need to right before you see her - every time. Nothing makes a girl more uncomfortable than body odor and/or bad breath.
8. Listen! You need to be a good listener. That works with most of the girls, they need someone who will patiently listen and understand them! There is a huge difference between "Hearing" and "Listening" so make sure you are actively listening to her.
9. Let her know about things she might be interested in. This will show her you remembered and are thinking about her, and the things she likes.
10. Don't forget her special occasions - especially her birthday.
11. Be truthful, there is no need to lie. Being honest during the dating process means you respect her wants and needs, but you also recognize your own. If you find yourself always apologizing or trying to soothe her ruffled feathers, you need to honestly decide whether or not the two of you are a match. Treating a girl well also means recognizing this truth, and telling her in a way that hurts as little as possible - as soon as you know.
12. Make her feel comfortable. Relax and enjoy the time you spend together.
13. Cooperate to understand her point of view if you disagree. Repeat or reflect her feelings so that she knows you really heard her. If it makes sense to you, apologize for your actions that upset her. If you feel you were in the right, however, tell her you didn't realize your actions would hurt her and you're sorry to cause her pain, and that you'll have to consider more carefully next time. As mentioned earlier - keep it real. Do NOT promise never to do it again if you don't intend to keep that promise. If the thing that upsets her is a thing that is fundamental to your personality, you might not be able to change it to a degree that will make her comfortable, and that may mean you will eventually have to part ways.
14. Be real with her, and with yourself. This cannot be stressed enough. If you find yourself saying or doing something and thinking another, step back. Take a look at yourself, and ask yourself what you really want. Share that self with her, because she can and will see that you aren't everything that you say and do.
Tips:
• When you are at a restaurant, sit across from her at the table (unless the table is really long, in which case you should sit next to her). Allow her to sit facing the room, while you face the wall. This way you give the impression that you require no view other than her beauty.
• Some girls won't want you to pay their way; if that's the case when you offer, don't press the issue. It's the thought that counts, and she's sure to recognize your courtesy.
• Taking her to places that cost lots of money isn't necessary. Take her to the park, maybe buy ice cream on the way; that way you interact with her. If you do go to the movies, plan on going for coffee or dessert after (which means a light dinner, and less expense - bonus!) so that you can talk about what you just saw.
• Take things slow. Don't rush into an emotional or physical attachment just because you think you should.
• Look her directly in the eyes when you speak to her or when she is speaking to you. But don't be creepy about it. Staring is not considered attentiveness, it's considered weird.
• Pay careful attention to your manners at all times.
• Show that you are impressed by her, but don't forget to impress her with something different. Show you are different and sometimes crazy about life. Show her something that only you have got.
• Girls are constantly analyzing you, what you do, how you dress, dates you take them on and lots of other things. Take this into account and dress for the situation, as a good balance will keep them impressed. There's no point in dressing to impress, then being cheap about where you take her. It's like going to a nice restaurant in a tracksuit.
• Avoid the temptation to idolize her or put her on a pedestal. She is as human as you are, and the more willing you are to accept that, the less likely she is to disappoint you.
• Arrogant men don't get all the girls, confident guys do - and there's a huge difference. Women are less visually-oriented than men are, so even if you're not the most attractive guy in the world, your confidence will suggest that you're someone worth being with and your personality will back up that suggestion. Plus, if you are kind and warm when interacting with her and with others, she will see your value without your needing to have movie-star good looks. Just act & dress like a gentleman and everything should be sweet
• Opening doors and pulling out chairs for the girl is not old fashioned, it's cute! Any girl likes a boy who will treat her well.
• Hold her close to you and be gentle when it's necessary.
• Don't swear excessively or be crude. If you act immaturely, she is less likely to enjoy your company.
• Put yourself in her place and treat her accordingly. In other words, how would you wish to be treated, if you were her?
Warnings:
• Don't stutter, mumble, or say "Um" or "Uh"; that will make her think you're bored. Take your time and think about what you want to say before you launch into some rambling tirade.
• If she tells you about a personal problem, don't try to fix it. Just listen to her. (There are a few exceptions.) If she starts to cry, this is a big clue that she's really into you - it indicates that she trusts you enough to show she's vulnerable with you. A nice gesture here is to put your arms around her and just hold her. Don't say "Don't cry." Say, "Aww. It's going to be okay."
• If you exaggerate your compliments or are insincere, a girl can usually see through that.
• Make sure you're being yourself. If you act like a gentleman when you are alone with her, and then like a jerk when you're with your friends, she will catch on and you will run into trouble.
• Most importantly: Make sure she doesn't find out you tried to learn how to make her laugh reading articles on the Internet. At least not 'til your one year anniversary. By then she's definitely into you and minor things like that won't hurt.
Taken from: http://www.wikihow.com/Treat-a-Girl-Well ---
I know the majority of these points are basic common sense but its easy to forget sometimes. Guys, take notes! And girls, I have just performed a good deed for all of us ;)
To Side Effects: Hope you guys take in this How To Treat A Girl lesson, I'll be quizzing you about it! Bazillion points to whoever successfully answers my questions :)
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First and foremost, I would like to wish Steenbus a very happy 16th birthday! I wish you all the best with whatever you do, I'll be there to support you every step of the way like you have with me :) Also a big birthday shout out to Hansel aka Green eggs & Hans! Hope you guys had a smashing birthday~!~!~!
Today was a fantastic day despite it being the one to kick start off my examination period. The morning was a complete daze, I was in the library for 2 hours trying to study for Modern History. I love the fact that all the Modern History students gathered together at a table to study and help each other out. I revised so much information, it felt like the info took up all the memory in my head! (It's probably worth 512MB)
To my surprise, my Modern Hist half yearly was only 1/7th of what I studied. It was so simple! A page of short answers and 2 long response questions. I hope that in saying the test was 'simple' I won't be' jinxing' my results or something..
So with 1 exam down and 5 to go, Steen and I decided to head off to Tommy's for a nutritional lunch :) Consequently, 'Britney', Davis and William were there and we had a fab talk about Pokemon, Indian stereotypes, the fact that a 'large' box of Tommy's chips is pretty freaking large, Mariah Carey's latest single, MILFs and 'how to grab a girl's attention at a party'. The conversation lasted longer than expected so we decided to drag it out to the park, ha. (The man at Tommy's was looking very suss.) The 'How To' guide continued as Tony pretended to be a girl and William tried his luck to grab Tony's attention. Lol to the max! On our way back to school (to study) the boys 'serenaded' Steen with "Side Effects" as a birthday present.
When we arrived at school, Steen, Thuy and I weren't bothered to study French so we sat down and ate what was left of the box of Tommy's. Steen and I decided that today was one of the best (in terms of conversations) and that we should continue for the rest of the week. (As relief from examinations.)
Lesson learnt: boys aren't so foreign after all. Oh, and they dig hot, I mean, pretty mums.
Anyways, I must study now. Wish me luck for the rest of week! I've got English and Biology tomorrow - more about that later ;)
| Mood: V. lazy Music: Forever Young by Youth Group
I know I should be studying. I know I should be studying.I know I should be studying. I know I should be studying. I know I should be studying.I know I should be studying. I know I should be studying. I know I should be studying.I know I should be studying.
Butttttttt I'm totally not. It's the worst feeling because I skipped a surprise party for nothing! Well, that's not entirely true, it's just my fault that I'm not at my study table making v. important study notes for my upcoming half yearlies. I seriously thought that once I became a 'Senior' I would magically turn into a hardcore Asian student. I thought turning 16 would make me cram less. Well, that myths busted!
I shouldn't even be blogging but this new layout makes it way exciting to post stuff! (Thanks to Danny) There's some things I still gotta fix but overall, I'm quite proud to own such a spiffy blog.
This feels like such a waste of time. Blogging is so time consuming. Everything is so time consuming! Time is 'eaten' away (ha @ pun. Y'know, 'consume = 'eat') and before you know it, it's gone. The concept of 'time' was the #1 topic in the majority of my conversations. My friends and I have wondered where all our time has gone. We still clearly remember what it was like to be a Junior and not have much expected of us but now we're hit in the face with buttloads of tasks to complete. Everything is passing by so quickly and I don't like it one bit!
Soon enough, half yearlies will be so yesterday and I'll be off to the compulsory Year 11 camp, Crossroads. With activities such as mountain bike riding and rock climbing, Crossroads is the perfect way to unwind after a chaotic week of examination (!)
A lesson to take from my current whinge is to make the most of now: it will soon be gone.
Don't it always seem to go that 'you don't know what you got, til it's gone'?
Monday, May 19, 2008, 8:39 PM
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Like, youthful innocence for example. I started organising my table contents today, since y'know, organised work table = organised work life. Duh. The cleaning up took longer than expected as I delved into the forgotten realm of my younger years (I'm talkin' primary to teenybopper Year 8 years). I was happy and sad at the same time; happy because I've rediscovered these documents and sad because it's collected dust from the past. I also uncovered some pretty 'hectic' primary school photos:
(Click to enlarge)
I used to be cute, right? Wicked shot. I even done my own hair that day.
For your own amusement.
I had this mega crush on that blonde, 2nd row, 3rd from the right.
MmMmm. I have this vivid memory back in the days when you had to elect Class Presidents in Primary. Half the guys got up and faced the whiteboard as the remaining students raised their hands to show the teacher how many students wanted a particular to become the Male Class President. Among my friends, the plan was to raise all our hands to elect Chris cos he was like, uber popular. The boys stood in alphabetical order and since Billy comes before Chris.. I raised my hand for Billy. Aaaaaaaah! I thought. And to make matters worse, I was the only one to raise their hand for Billy. Ha.
Hawt.
There was this phase where curly hair was the new freaking black so I begged my parents for curly hair. My wish was granted on one condition: that my father would have to take me. I knew this was entering a danger zone (for those who know my embarrassing father)but c'mon, it's curly hair! 2 hours later I came home with a perm. Dandy. Anyways, this is a few months later and I guess I got the curls I wanted. Except during this time straight hair was in. Gosh. P.S. Ignore the marks on random faces. My sister went crazy with permanent marker. And no, that is not a heart between my portrait and the guy diagonally across from me :)
-- Back to my desk clearing, as I rummaged through the past, I took particular interest in my academic progress over the years. I sure was a bright student from the very beginning (in all modesty). My average was an A and my lowest was C (for stupid Agriculture. What. The. Yeah, I used to go Hoxton, we had a farm at the back. We sophisticated!)
I was a total nerd in Year 8, esp. in English. One day we had to write a mini essay based on the phrase "How I Chose To Live My Life":
'The Lord is my Shepard, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and staff comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.'
- Psalm 23:1-6
Christianity. My religious belief. Ever since I left my mum's womb on the 29th of April, I was a Christian. I believed in my Saviour, my spiritual Father, Lord Jesus Christ. Yes everyone had their beliefs: Buddha, Virgin Mary, Jesus, Santa Claus, leprechauns yadda yadda. Not necessarily all religious, but something to look up to, to look forward to. Santa equals to Christmas and the Easter Bunny equals to, well, Easter. My point is, Christianity shapes my life. If not for Jesus, us Christians believe that without His resurrection we all would've died in our sin. But not everyone is Christian, so not everyone will believe this. But I do.
Being Christian lets me have a reason to have faith in something that I cannot see, that I cannot hear. Being Christian gave me my many church friends. Being Christian opened my eyes to the greater good. I know the 10 commandments are there to follow and that the Bible is there to inspire. I know that I should love thy neighbour, that I should love my enemies, as I love myself. I know prayer is love through words to God. By knowing this, I know that bring good is way better than being bad in the long run.
People think that being religious is a disadvantage in your social records because if you're 'Christian', you automatically 'have to go to Church'. But I consider it as a privilege. It makes you feel good to sing songs of praise. People look up to you when you let loose and sing your heart out. (It's a sign of faith.) It makes you feel good when you are baptised. You feel clean and you feel ready to depend on God. You are cleansed.
God's words inspire me. They make me want to say and do something to make someones day. Sometimes when I'm down in the dumps, I think of what God would do. I've experienced many challenges in life, but God helps me out. I might not have hard proof of what God has done for me but it's nice to think of all the wondrous things He's done in my life.
I've experienced this one time when ______________. I saw it with my own eyes. With the help of my Pastor and his wife, they comforted my family through the words of God. ________________________. When I look back, I thank God that my family hasn't fallen apart like in those sad movies. My mum says she'll never leave my dad for anything. She thinks that her children will grow up screwed. Nice one, mum. I do admit that my family has the occasional biff but we get over it.
As Forest Gump goes, 'Life is a box of chocolates. You never know what's inside it' (or something similar). I agree. You never know what's around the next corner. At least I know God will be there for me with every step I take.
Yeah, total noobage. Who the heck uses 'yadda yadda' & 'way better' in an essay??!?!?! And who the heck forgets that Forest Gump line? There are many things I was too young to know better of. Like, those blank lines for example. I disclosed something very private in that essay (and yes, this essay was read out loud, by yours truly). Those were the days when you would tell the bigmouth your innermost secret because you thought your trust would change the size of their mouth (so to speak). Secondly, I don't consider myself 'religious'. To me, that is showcasing that you have a religious belief and that you think it makes you better than everyone else. Well, I say 'nay' to that sort of mentality. No one is ever better than anyone else. I truly believe that we are all equal - we all bleed red.
I have so much more to tell you guys about (i.e. more documents!) Ha, I embarrass myself! Til next time! ;)
Just about the time the shadows call, I undress my mind and dare you to follow. Paint a portrait of my mystery, only close my eyes and you are here with me. A nameless face to think I see to sit and watch the waves with me, til they're gone. A heart I swear I'd recognize is made out of my own devices ...could I be wrong?
Time that I've taken, I pray it's not wasted. Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love?
Sleepless nights you creep inside of me, paint your shadows on the breath that we share. You take more than just my sanity-- you take myr eason not to care. No ordinary wings I'll need-- the sky itself will carry me back to you.
The things I dream that I can do, I'd open up the moon for you... Just come down soon.
Time that I've taken..I pray it's not wasted. Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love....
Ready and waiting for a heart worth the breaking. But I'd settle for an honest mistake in the name of one sweet love.
Weave your shadows in the breath that we share
Savor the sorrow to soften the pain, sip on the southern rain, as I do, I don't look, don't touch, don't do anything, but hope that there is a you.
The earth that is the space between, I'd banish it from under me, to get to you. Your unexpected love provides my solitary suicide… oh I wish I knew...
The time that I've taken, I pray it's not wasted. Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love? Ready and waiting for a heart worth the breaking.. But I'd settle for an honest mistake in the name of one sweet love.
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I'm loving Sara Bareilles' album atm, many thanks to Vee for getting it for my birthday :) One Sweet Love is one of my favourite songs. Make sure you check out her album, 'Little Voice'. It's owrth a listen!
I'm supposed to be typing up a speech due on Friday for English Advanced. It's based on Change and I have to relate it to not only Othello but to 2 other texts. I'm majorly confused but I'll manage somehow. I'm ever so grateful my teachers have decided to make the students say it in front of both English Adv classes *rolls eyes*. No, really, a major upside is that there is now a 1 in 60 chance of getting chosen randomly from a hat!
[Returns back to post 2 hours later]
I feeeeeeeeeeel sooooooooooo lazy! oeueowsuhweouthoue
[While watching a plastic bag blow around in the wind on a video] Ricky Fitts: It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. And this bag was, like, dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. And that's the day I knew there was this entire life behind things, and... this incredibly benevolent force, that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... and I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in.
Ricky Fitts: I was filming this dead bird. Angela Hayes: Why? Ricky Fitts: Because it's beautiful.
Don't you wish you could look at a dead bird and see beauty?
Yeah, I'm not being insensitive but I don't think I've matured to the extent that I can reach 'deep' enough within me to find beauty in what we call 'trash' and 'dead animals'. But this film is inspiring on so many levels. So I don't have the maturity of a 60 year old but I can see the good in American Beauty. Mind you, I haven't seen the film in ages (being months) but I happened to remember the plastic bag scene today. Sometimes I struggle to see the good left in this world because I tend to dwell on all the cons, with all the crime and whatnot. Even petty things like having a bad hair day. Woe is me! But today I feel okay, I feel that life is worth living and that there is good in me and there is good in you. There is good in everyone and everything. Guess that's where they got that 'silver lining' quote from.
Just wanted to share my 'life's okay' mood with you, before I change my mind and hate my toenails or something. Also posted as an indication that I haven't abandoned my blog as yet!
I don't know what the lesson is today. So I'll share a cliche:
If you see someone not smiling, give them yours :)
| Mood: Tired/ stressed/ crazy/ content Music: 103.2 FM
Breathe in, breathe out, Tell me all of your doubts, & Everybody bleeds this way, Just the same.
Breathe in, breathe out, Move on and break down, If everyone goes away i will stay.
We push and pull, & I fall down sometimes, I'm not letting go, You hold the other line.
Cause there is a light in your eyes, in your eyes.
Hold on hold tight, From out of your sight, If everything keeps moving on, moving on, Hold on hold tight, Make it through another night, & everyday there comes a song with the dawn, We push and pull and I fall down sometimes, I'm not letting go, You hold the other line.
Cause there is a light, in your eyes, in your eyes. There is a light, in your eyes, in your eyes.
Breathe in, and breathe out. Breathe in, and breathe out. Breathe in, and breathe out. Breathe in, and breathe out.
Look left look right, To the moon in the night. & everything under the stars is in your arms.
Cause there is a light, in your eyes in your eyes. There is a light, in your eyes, in your eyes. There is a light, in your eyes, in your eyes. There is a light, in your eyes, in your eyes. -----
Lovely song to listen to whilst hunching over in the computer seat, hoping your feet won't be swollen forever after 4.5 hours of chaotic shopping on a Thursday night.
Oh, but it definitely is Happy Hour right now :D Steen and I spotted Total Hottie in Woolworths twice before lining up for refreshments at Mac-donkey to end a tiring shopping spree. I was a customer behind from Steen, and when she turned around to face me after her purchase, she told me to 'look behind you (!!!)' in a hushed tone. I swung around like a blind bat and saw nothing of particular interest. She told me to try looking behind the person behind me and there he was!!! 'Total hottie'!!!!! I, being the ever so subtle character that I am, squealed and faced back to the front sharply. *Phew* Close call. I bought a frozen Coke then left the line, sad that I was a customer away from Total Hottie. I reluctantly dragged my feet across the food court then decided to turn around for one last look and ..he was looking back at me. *Faints!* I screamed then pushed my trolley full of party supplies towards the entrance of Liverpool Westfields. Steen laughed then looked back at him and screamed also. He was still looking!!! We lingered metres away from the entrance, hoping to sneak more peeks at himw ithout him noticing. Ahhhh!
Haha, I was calling it "Happy Hour" because at Little Hong Kong (asian food joint) has 'Happy Hour' around 4-5pm where all the food is like, $2-3 per take away box. Now it's been 2 hours after that incident and it's still Happy Hour! He was soooo stalking us. It's like, fate. Seeing him unintentionally isn't good enough for you? How about seeing the number plate 'BBY 467' while talking about him? EH? Enough destiny for you?
Lesson learnt: The more you want something (a la boypren), the less likely it will come. Therefore, the act of 'letting go' of petty needs somehow draws them to you. Unneccessarily, but conveniently :) I.e. after feeling battered and lethargic, seeing Total Hotties is literally a sight for sore eyes and a sensation for sore everything!
| Mood: Frustrated. Less than perfect. Music: Shiver/ God Put A Smile Upon Your Face by Coldplay; Be Be Your Love by Rachael Yamagata; Sleeping In by The Postal Service; November by Azure Ray
I am a human yo-yo. Watch me go on a rollercoaster ride.
Uh, "lesson learnt"? I am crazy.
Maybe you clicked on my link to find something enlightening or humorous. Guess this guy will have to do:
I wish we could all bake a cake made of rainbows and smiles so we could all eat it and *tears swell up* ..be happy
*Sobs*
FYI: I like to shower and smell nice.
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for spiritual sustenance
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." - Galatians 6:9 (NIV)
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the dearly beloved
KINDRED SPIRITS STEENBUSCARTHY JELLYCOPTA
TWEENZ JAHT
BATMAN My v7
'if only we recorded our conversation'
Thuy: [On LOTR] *High-pitched* He left on a ship with the elves!!! Jenny: *Mocking in high-pitched tone* He left on a ship with the elves!!! *Aly & Helen laugh* Thuy: *High-pitched* It was so sad! Jenny: *Mocking in high-pitched tone* It was so sad! *Aly & Helen laugh harder* Thuy: *High-pitched, red faced* Shut up, Jenny!!! Jenny: *Mocking in high-pitched tone* Shut up, Jenny!!! * Everyone rolls around laughing*
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